


Breaking the News

by Stackthedeck



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Domestic Fluff, M/M, everyone is trying their best including me, lucy the dog is here, mom friend penny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-27
Updated: 2018-12-27
Packaged: 2019-09-28 20:58:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17190293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stackthedeck/pseuds/Stackthedeck
Summary: Agatha and Penny have kept in touch but, how much have they been telling each other? Agatha is back in England for a week and Penny has invited her to say at her flat for a few days. What could go wrong? Baz and Simon haven't talked to Agatha since Watford and Penny has asked they break the news that they're dating gently. Baz doesn't know the meaning of the word.





	Breaking the News

**Penelope**

I used to think third wheeling Agatha and Simon was bad. I walk into the flat and see Simon on Baz’s lap. Not in a gross way (although they do tend to forget when someone else is in the room) just in an always-have-to-be-touching way. I take a seat in the armchair and swipe the remote, changing the channel.

“Hey, we were watching that,” Simon protest, taking his eyes off his boyfriend to pout at me.

“Yeah, Bunce.” Baz, on the other hand, only takes his eyes off Simon to glare at me.

“You were watching each other.” I roll my eyes. I’m happy that Simon’s happy but Baz can be a pain sometimes. “Baz, do you even have your own flat?”

“Bunce, you know I’m far too rich to pay rent,” Baz says in his fake posh voice, wearing jeans that are so ripped that they lean more towards hobo than fashionable. He may be a pain but, Baz is much more fun to exchange witty banter with than Simon.

My phone buzzes and I see that Agatha has texted. Shit, that’s what I’ve been forgetting.

I clear my throat. “Hey boys?”

“Hmm?” Simon murmurs. He’s already enraptured by Baz again. Those two are insufferable, once they decide to be all romantic, there is no stopping them.

“Boys?” I try again, louder. Nothing. “Fire!” That gets Baz’s attention. He jumps off the sofa then immediately glares at me. I swear his face has two modes: glare and heart eyes at Simon.

“Penny,” Simon scolds, “that’s not funny.” I can see him hiding a smile behind his hand. I wasn’t doing it to be funny but, there’s always next time.

“As I was trying to say,” I say sternly, “Agatha is coming to visit.”

“Absolutely not,” Baz growls, crossing his arms over his chest. Simon and I both roll our eyes.

“This is my flat and I’m allowed to have friends over.”

“Yeah,” Simon pitches in then looks at me. “Like Agatha, Agatha?” He glances protectively at Baz.

“Simon, you and Agatha were friends before you started dating, you can be friends after you stopped dating.”

“Yeah, but what about-” he motions vaguely at Baz “-you know?”

“Use your words, Snow,” Baz snorts. Simon shoots him a glare. Good to know Baz has rubbed off on him. I pinch the bridge of my nose. Even when Baz isn’t “plotting” he and Simon give me a headache.

I sit them both down on the sofa and stand over them with my hand on my hip. “Agatha is not a homewrecker. You two will break it to her _gently_ that you’re dating.” I overemphasize gently, Baz doesn’t know the meaning. I once saw him get a guy to buy him four drinks, snog Simon in front of the poor bloke, then give half the drinks to Simon. It was like watching Americans with fireworks, horrifyingly amazing.

“Simon-” I waggle my finger at him. Oh Merlin, I’m turning into my mother. “-you will catch up with her and treat her like an old friend, not an ex-girlfriend.”

“I won’t make things weird,” he mumbles with a huff like I can’t still feel the awful tension between them at the beginning of our eighth year.

“Baz, you will apologize for leading Agatha on for so long,” I say in my sternest voice. Baz is a little harder to boss around but, I have my ways.

“You can’t order me around.” Tough words from someone mumbling and not meeting my eyes.

“Or,” I continue on as if I didn’t hear him, “you and Simon will have to find a different place to snog.”

Baz glowers at me. “That’s cruel, Bunce.”

I widen my stance and place both of my fists on my hip. “Do I have your word, boys?”

“Yes,” they moan. I must say, seeing them sitting on the sofa like scolded school-boys almost makes all my third wheeling worth it. Almost.

“So, when’s she coming?” Simon asks.

I wince. “...Tomorrow.”

**Agatha**

I’d be lying if I said I missed England. Everything about England pales in comparison to California (literally, why is everyone so pasty here?). Honestly, I never imagined I’d come back but, I’ve missed a few things: My horses, my parents, Penny, Baz, and Simon. In that order.

Penny picks me up from the airport. As we drive back to her flat, we try to make plans for the week. I want to go shopping, she wants to go to museums. We compromise on a shopping trip that includes a couple of bookstores. Penny and I are as different as night and day so our conversation turns into awkward silence after that.

“So… how’s Simon?” I try. Penny tenses up a little. Which is understandable, the breakup was… weird.

“He’s good,” Penny says, staring at the road even though we’re stuck in traffic. “We have a flat together.”

“Oh.” I pucker my lips like I just ate a lemon drop. “Are you two… you know?”

Penny turns bright red. “Oh gross, never! Besides, I’m with Micah, remember?”

I do remember but it’s easy to forget. Penny never talks about him unless I bring it up. “So is Simon running for the Coven?” All those years of political science classes and being the mage’s heir, he must be doing something with it.

“No, even if he wanted to run, I don’t think he could,” Penny laughs as if it’s an inside joke.

“Why’s that?”

“You know what,” Penny says, tapping her fingers against the steering wheeling, “If I tell you everything about Simon, you two will have nothing to talk about.”

I guess that’s true but I feel like I need to mentally prepare myself. We spend the rest of the car ride talking about Uni classes.

**Baz**

Wellbeloved walks in with far too much luggage (and that’s coming from me) and a dog. Snow’s face lights up. Not because of Wellbeloved, he just does that every time he sees a dog. He shoots off the couch then realizes that might be too much all at once.

“Hey Agatha, how was your flight?” His eyes dart between her and the dog. Wellbeloved looks at him like he just sprouted a tail which is fair because he does have wings and a tail.

“It was good,” she says slowly as she stares at his wings. “When did all this happen?” She motions at his wings. She’s clearly in shock.

“After the whole mage thing.” He shrugs, rubbing the back of his neck. Snow doesn’t talk about that day, except with his therapist.

“And they stayed?” Wellbeloved sounds more curious than shocked now. She looks like she wants to touch his wings. “Can’t you just spell them away?”

“Penny usually does in the mornings but I don’t mind having them out in the flat.”

“Oh,” Wellbeloved says and just like that the conversation fizzles out. A long pause of the two staring at anything that isn’t each other.

“Can I pet your dog?” Snow finally blurts out. Those are the magic words because Wellbeloved looks beyond relieved. In fact, she looks overjoyed.

“Of course,” she squeals, “Her name is Lucy. I actually found her the same day with the incident with the mage. She is the sweetest thing and loves people.” Bunce, who’s been watching Wellbeloved and Snow’s conversation like a trainwreck, shoots me a glance. Now that I think about it, the dog does look familiar.

Bunce clears her throat. “Agatha, why don’t you sit down and I’ll make us some tea.” Snow has picked up the dog and it doesn’t seem the least bit bothered by his wings and tail. He sits on the rug and the dog laps at his face. How is my boyfriend so adorable? Wellbeloved moves towards the sofa and stops dead in her tracks when she sees me. She looks like she’s stepped into an episode of the twilight zone which is fair, a number of vampires have been featured in quite a few of the episodes.

“Baz?” she squeaks the words out, “What are you doing here?”

Snow pushes the dog off him, which is quite a feat for his willpower and physical strength (the dog is unreasonably well fed). “Did Penny not tell you? Baz and I are cool now.”

“Just cool, Snow?” I smirk, quirking my eyebrow. Snow’s face flushes. I remember Bunce telling us to break the news gently so I queal the bit of flirtation inside myself.

“You’re maybe in my top ten list of favorite people,” Snow jokes, also trying to keep things strictly platonic.

“Do you even know ten people?” I jeer. He rolls his eyes.

Agatha glances at us boredly. “I see nothing has changed between you two.”

“Our bickering is just a bit more friendly,” Snow laughs. His eyes light up when he smiles and there’s still dog slobber on his face. If I could, I’d be blushing.

“Much friendlier,” I leer. Snow turns red but Wellbeloved doesn’t notice because she’s staring at me. Her face is that of someone trying to solve a riddle. Snow has gone back to playing with the dog and Wellbeloved has sat down on the sofa, far too close to me. Nope, nope, nope, no thank you, we don’t need any. I scoot away.

“So, Baz, what have you been doing?” Wellbeloved leans closer to me. No, this is not how it was supposed to go. Snow and I planned before she got here. He catches up with her, we break the news, I apologize. Snow’s on the floor and I’m the one catching up and then some.

“Majoring in economics,” I say with a blank expression, “And you?”

“I’m living in California and in Uni but, I haven’t decided my major yet.” She scoots closer to me. Is she really coming onto me in front of her ex-boyfriend?

Bunce walks in with four cups of tea, placing one in front of each of us then takes a set in the armchair. No, Penny come back, I need a buffer. Snow is obliviously playing with the dog.

Wellbeloved takes a sip of her tea then hits me with, “So, do you have a girlfriend?” I nearly choke on my tea. She’s lowered her voice so that Snow and Bunce can’t hear.

“I don’t have a girlfriend,” I say, not matching her volume. I don’t know why I don’t just tell her that I’m off the market except Bunce said to be gentle. Something about telling a girl that’s hitting on you that you’re dating her ex doesn’t seem gentle to me. “What about you, Wellbeloved, do you have a girlfriend?” Snow has heard us by now and is glancing wildly between Agatha and me. Bunce, on the other hand, is watching like I’m a cat about to fall off a counter.

“No,” Wellbeloved giggles, cheeks rosy, “I don’t have a boyfriend for that matter either.” she puts a hand on my knee. Okay, fuck being gentle.

“Simon,” I call. Snow perks up immediately, he’s too easy. “Can you come here for a second?” He does, although reluctantly, clearly confused about the situation. As soon as he’s in arms reach, I grab his shirt collar and pull him into a kiss. It’s sweet and lingering. Agatha gasps. Penny groans. Simon suppresses a moan.

“I said, break it to her gentle,” Bunce says as soon as we pull away.

“Well I was trying but, _someone_ was busy playing with a dog.” I glare at Snow.

“Sorry, Agatha, we-” he starts, frowning and debating whether to put a hand on her shoulder.

“Oh Merlin, this explains so much,” Agatha gasps. I’m pretty sure she hasn’t heard a word since the kiss.

“What?” Snow and Bunce spit out at the same time.

“Well Simon has always been obsessed with Baz and Baz would only stare at me when Simon was around.” She says this more like she’s rationalizing out loud rather than speaking to other humans.

“Listen, Agatha,” I sigh, feeling a death stare from Bunce burning holes through the back of my head, “I’m sorry for leading you on all those years. I was really just trying to get Snow’s attention.”

Wellbeloved rolls her eyes. “You didn’t need me to get his attention.” We both laugh and it feels good. Maybe I’ll give her a chance this week. Bunce is friends with her for a reason, I guess.

She scoots away from me and I pat the empty space between us. Simon sits between us. He and Agatha enthusiastically talk about Lucy as I throw my arm over his shoulder.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, I hoped you enjoyed. Don't forget to leave a comment or Kudos! Let me know down in the comments if you liked it and maybe I could write some more Snowbaz one-shots.


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